Minny-

We are off to newly built, open air, Minnesota-Nice stadium despite logic and weather reports. This trip will not involve a stay at the Monte Carlo, but we'll get by.

For those of you that aren't familiar with my last MSU sports related trip to Minneapolis I'll briefly fill you in. In 2001 the MSU men's basketball team made yet another final four run (3rd year in a row) and my friend and I won the lottery for tickets. We left with about $80 in cash each and our charm.

Of course we had no accommodations lined up, but we were confident we would run into someone we knew and would crash on their floor. We ended up staying at the luxurious 4 star* Monte Carlo. Think leather recliners, individual climate control** and in wall sound system. It was newly built in 1996.

To be exact it was a 1996 Chevrolet Monte Carlo, red, w/ black leather interior. We, of course, did not have blankets, sleeping bags, or feeling in our extremeties.

The 2009 trip will not involve sleeping in a car if I can help it. I am looking forward to seeing the new stadium but also planning to stay out of the weather as long as possible. The forecast: cloudy with a chance of arctic.

The Minn football team has a problem. Decker, the all american and B10 leading receiver, is out. For the year. The offense will have to find new weapons as Decker was the offense. Think Ringer x 2.

I am a little concerned about what comes next. If the game plan and schemes change significantly this week it will obviously be tough to scout and may take the first half to adjust to. It is a tough draw either way because a week from now there will be tape on the new Minn offense. With Decker healthy he is a very, very tough matchup but you know what you are getting. This is almost worse.

I still like MSU, setting aside any weather related fumbles or flukes, to win the game. The defense has looked better in recent weeks and the offense has done just enough to stay in each game. I like the linebackers to wrap up and contain the sideline to sideline running attack and the db's to limit the stretch passing game. Special teams kick returns could be the best shot for Minn to hit quickly.

I like:

MSU - 23
MN -- 14







*crash rating

**dual climate control while running. single out of control climate while not running.

ALSO

In the latest installment of "Why we suck as a Network: The BTN story" we were treated to a nice conversation about how the commentator has a short tie and his preference for sweater vests over regular vests, as well as the bickering brother antics of those two favorite rascals, Gerry DiNardo and Glen Mason. Boy do I love self promotion of terribly overplayed contrived rivalries. For those of you familiar with John Clayton and Sean Salisbury on Four Downs or Skip Bayless and anyone who sits across the table on First and Ten you understand. I totally buy that they hate each other and disagree on everything.

This nice bit of information was provided during the injury timeout, sometime between the actual hit and 45 seconds later when the flag came in. The only reason we didn't go to commercial, one must presume, is because BTN ran out of things to mix with Rotel. Be careful kids, 32 commercials about Rotel in one game can lead to such antics. We can also presume that they ran out of "look how awesome and edgy the BTN is" commercials, too.

I think we should put together a bracket, NCAA basketball syle, for all the promotions and networks on television [worth noting]. I'm pretty sure that the Snuggie would eliminate BTN in the first round. Sadly I don't think it would be close.

The good news? The Spartans are on the BTN yet again this week. Look out XFL fans and Gopher historians. Gerry DiNardo and Glen Mason are BACK. And this time, its personal.*




*Personal does not mean watchable and may in fact come off as kitschy. Void where prohibited including Guam, Quebec, and Puerto Rico. The program and network cannot be redeemed for any cash value and may in fact require payment for any attempted redemption.

Iowa is a four letter word

There are so many things worth discussing about this game that I simply cannot get to all of them, but I'll hit what I feel are the high points.

1. This game will go down as a great battle, which it was, but I don't know that it was a great game. I enjoy a pitcher's duel, a defensive battle if you will, but this was partly defensive dominance and partly offensive ineptitude. I believe that it will be remembered as a great game because of the old boxing truism; win the last 30 seconds and you win the judges. The fans were excited for the last four minutes and will remember it as a classic.

2. The personal foul call did not lose the game -- although the two offside penalties may have -- but it surely didn't help. Iowa was pinned deep and would have been looking at a 3rd and long had the flag not been thrown. After the ref watched the replay. After a legal hit. The receiver turned up field, dropped his head, and the defender blasted him in the upper shoulder. The hit may have rolled up into the helmet, but it was the offensive player that made that possible. He was not defenseless. Twice this year we've been hit by bad, bad personal foul calls.

3. There are all sorts of clever sayings for the prevent defense. It only prevents you from winning being the most common. I tend to disagree. However, Iowa does not have a deep threat. Don't worry about changing things up. Do what you have been doing.

4. I am upset that the final pass play did not have safety help and that the corner did not take away the slant, making the QB throw the much tougher fade or out and giving the blitz more time to apply pressure. I'm not mad about the result so much. How many plays from inside the 6 can we truly hope to stop in one game? I mean, we held strong on at least two goal line possessions.

5. I will call it the Hook and Ladder. I know that the hook and lateral makes more sense. I like to think of a ladder fire truck, reaching out a certain distance initially before providing a platform for the extended second portion of the ladder. Plus the yard markers make nice rungs. In any event, the play hardly ever works because you know it is coming. 99.99% of the time it is the last play of a game. BUT, if you run it with 2+ minutes left on a 3rd down (rather than another obvious trickeration down) it is brilliant. It was executed almost perfectly. I'll say almost because, as I've discussed with a few people since the game, Caper was trailing White and could have taken a block from White to score sooner. Who knows if it makes any difference.

What is most upsetting about the game is that Iowa is not that good. The lines are far superior to MSU's lines, and the starting TE is better than any of MSU's TE's, but other than that MSU is better at nearly every skill position. MSU is deeper and better at QB, RB, LB, and deeper at least at TE. This team is not as good as Penn State overall and not as good on defense as OSU. The MSU defense looked stout against the terrible Iowa offense with the exception of one bad series, where Iowa was wide open for 11 yard pass after 11 yard pass somewhat by design.

Bad calls were a factor. A much greater factor was jumping offsides twice on hard counts (one on a 3rd and 5) and DROPPED PASSES primarily at tight end. Sims dropped two that hit his hands. One would have kept a drive alive and killed the clock. The other would have set up a 3rd and very short, opening up a shot down field to Cunningham or White. The drops were, in my mind, the biggest reason Iowa was even in the game.

MSU Iowa

At the beginning of the season I thought Iowa had the best lines on both sides of the ball. I wasn't sure how they would answer the running back question and what sort of pressure the defensive line would get on the qb, but it terms of getting pushed around, these boys are big and strong.

That said, Iowa is not a great or explosive team. Stanzi is pretty solid at QB and getting better with experience. I really think this is a chance for MSU's safeties and corners to pump up the interception numbers. While they have been solid against the various spread offenses the last few weeks there haven't been many opportunities to pick off passes. When you throw the ball 8 yards or less on 80% of your passes there aren't many chances. Add in the fact that you can't gamble and jump a route because everyone is so compact on defense (miss one tackle and there is no help deep) and the Northwestern style spread makes you play on your heels. I like MSU to get two interceptions Saturday night.

In terms of the night game talk, I'm not sure what to think. The fans love it. The running backs love it. I'm not sure how Cousins will react. I do like that Nichol appears to be out for this game. His footwork would be nice against this Iowa line but I don't like his tendency to just make a throw to make a throw. You can't take risks against Iowa because they are disciplined on defense and wait for you to beat yourself.

Not sure if I missed the update this week but it appears Nichol might have given us the first true diagnosis since the arm injury. It looked like a dislocation after watching the replay but Dantonio gave no information. Nichol gave no information at first but the LSJ recently wrote:

MSU's trainers have told him "I'm healing faster than they've ever seen a dislocation heal."

I like MSU to get the upset, surprise people with a pretty good running game, and hold the Iowa passing game in check. Iowa will get some yardage on the ground but MSU wins the turnover battle and the game.

MSU - 27
Iowa - 13

Northwestern MSU

The Northwestern Wildcats come to town for MSU homecoming with an upset in mind. Northwestern used the spread offense to keep defenses on their heals in the mid '90's. Now they use the clock. Northwestern averages almost twice as many plays from scrimmage as their opponents. Its a race to get to the line, snap, run the play, and get back to the line.

This scheme comes natural to NU players. They've been doing it since, what, 3rd grade chess club.

Think about it. Make a decision, make the move, punch the clock. It's like speed chess. This would explain why Pat Fitzgerald has been seen recruiting the North Avenue Beach and Chess Pavilion. Sure, some of these kids won't work out 11 years down the road, what with being 128 lbs in their senior year, but some will work out.

Take Shane Pluto Wilmet, a 6th grader from Schaumburg, IL, who has been watched by NU since 2nd grade. He has great clock times, has a 96% winning percentage since turning park pro, and obviously has the potential to be, well, "husky." This is his latest recruiting shot:

There are some questions as to how Shane will do in a standing position or how a helmet will change his speed and accuracy. But the writing on the wall is becoming more clear. Wildcat offense?! I don't think so. Think Giuoco Piano with a side of King's Gambit. WildChessCat Offense.

MSU - 34

NU -- 20

I am the Best Attorney Ever Recorded

Or at least the best in the last 25 years.



I would like to point out that no one keeps these records so that was based on an estimate. I did, somewhat verifiably, set my own personal best.

And this only supports my first instinct. RRod is a lying, cheating, do whatever you have to do and say whatever you have to say jerkface. He is driven, probably good at what he does, but doesn't seem to know boundaries. As one former B10 coach described him:

"a wizard hat wearing snake oil salesman."

Tell us how you really feel.

If you missed the latest RRod factoid to be filed in the "he's a dbag" file it was this. While under fire for breaking NCAA practice rules he cried, lied, and denied. One lie among many was with regard to his team GPA. Something to the effect of "the best GPA in 25 years" and "the best ever recorded" at ummm. Not once, but multiple times he touted the recent acomplishments of his team in the classroom.

Turns out he lied to the wrong people. Turns out when you are under fire from the press you shouldn't make things up. Turns out FOIA allows you to request documents from public offices, like a public university athletic department, that might just get you called out later on.

When that damned media made a FOIA request to find out, oh I don't know, the actual GPA data RRod would have needed to make such a claim, it didn't exist. At least that is what the response was. To which RRod stated "it was an estimate." Ballsy estimate fella.

Don't let facts get in the way. Don't let the truth, rules, or ethics get in the way.

Um Wrap up

Someday, theoretically, my attitude Sunday -- Wednesday won't depend on the result of a college football game. Basketball is more intense but games are played more frequently, so there are chances for redemption. Football is longer lasting.

What a beautiful week eh? Dreary outside, rain off and on, cold and blowing. The leaves haven't really changed yet and work is, well, work. Beautiful.

If you haven't heard there is a bit of a to do regarding a Dantonio radio interview with WJR AM radio in Detroit. To provide some context MSU signed a radio contract with WJR to carry MSU sports after about 1.4 jillion years of covering ummm sports. WJR's staff includes about 94% ummm junkies and apologists.

Dantonio was on the radio and had answered about the 3rd question in a row about what Michigan did and what Michigan didn't do and finally threw it back in the [admitted umm fan] DJ's face:

“I must tell you, the look on State fans’ faces when we were going into overtime was almost that resigned look of ‘oh, no, here we go again. I cannot believe, we dominated this game … ’”

“Well, Paul, hold on a second,” Dantonio said. “Because the look I saw on Michigan’s faces were ‘oh, no, the Spartans beat us again.’ That’s the look I saw.”

He also downplayed the comeback by recalling stating "Forcier...did play good for about 5 minutes..." but added that MSU dominated for the rest of the game.

Exactly. Exactly what I was thinking all Saturday night, Sunday morning, and through yesterday as the talk was about Forcier this and Forcier that. Yes he's a frosh qb. Yes he has done some great things. They lost. He threw the interception. Ummm got the benefit of every call, every miscue, and some freshman heroics and still lost.

The biggest story of the year so far, in my mind, is the loss of Jenrette. I think this defense was missing two things: a pass rush and a big hitter at safety. Jenrette provided the latter and he will be missed. If a corner can't cover a receiver at the very least he should be thinking about the enormous hit he is going to take from the safety. It only takes one good knock early to have the receivers looking downfield before they catch the ball. Hopefully he returns before the Penn State game.

**************************
uhh, Go Tigers?? (5:04 pm on TBS and ESPN radio)
**************************

The Ill-noise team that MSU faces this week is no joke. Starting qb juice williams has been benched but the team remains dangerous. I like MSU to run, run, run the ball to keep the big Ill wide receivers off the field. I like the MSU tight ends to finally show up this week, and I like the MSU linebackers to continue to play big against a scrambling, athletic, desperate group of fighting...orange things.

This Ill team is a perfect example of RonZook as a coach. Look at Florida. He recruited about 75% of the kids that won the national championship soon after he was booted. He came to Illinois and got some kids, some big recruits with a good deal of talent and potential, and proceeded to make them worse. He is not a coach. He is a recruiter. Juice Williams is a senior and is now worse than he was as a Sophomore. There is no running game and the athletes are being out athleted. The real question is: Can Illinois find a decent x+o coach in the next year or so before the talent runs out?

MSU -- 30
Ill ----- 17

That call is terrible: part 2

The "hit to the head" on little man taint was NOT a hit to the head. Not even close. Terrible.

THAT CALL IS TERRIBLE

That late hit call, from this POS ref that has called a TON of bad calls. Fumble gets it back but What the Hell? This guy has money on the game.

Also, I was growing rather tired of the "just settle on a qb" and "pick a guy...rythm...blah blah" talk this last week. But watching this fiasco of playing Nichol pisses me off. Just play Cousins. If he isn't in the rest of the game we had better find out he broke his ankle on that scramble. Otherwise this is a joke.

btn

Thank you, again, BTN, for helping me miss the long pass from Nichol coming off commercial. Again I was able to add to the list of products I will never again consider buying.

Also, the Nichol throw to Gannt that did not connect showed Nichol getting nailed in the head after the play, like a punch, which isn't surprising for a ummmm player.

No matter, Winston down the sideline for a TD. I don't think anyone wanted to get in the way.

My two cents:

umm is trying to run the ball because Forcier's shoulder is worse than we think. There is no way you don't throw the ball on us. Short throws to the wide side and runs aren't ideal against the Spartans. ummm knows that. They can't throw the ball from where I sit.

Shootout Schmootout

Thank you BigTen network, for helping us miss 2 full plays. That commercial was important. Otherwise I wouldn't know what product to hate for being associated with your network.

And as I suspected the "first team to score 80 wins" logic falls to the side. How often have we seen it? Previously MIA defenses appear for the first time and we have a 10-6 halftime score.

I don't like a few things about this game but the score is not one of them.

Cousins looks good. Cunningham and White look good. Winston is bound to break one, and I like Caper in there to mix things up. Time of possession looks great. Defense held up after a tipped ball interception inside the 30.

DB's are giving up the 3-5 yard pass play too easily. Not hitting the qb enough. Too many penalties, and penalties that could have been called. Michigan bounces a kick off the upright. Michigan helmets are ugly.

Gameday

It is 5:50 am.

Davey has been up for 3.5 hours, despite the fact that the commute today will be about 16 minutes rather than an hour.

Sam, yes Sam, is up and already out the door. Muscle memory has obviously been taken to a new level as we all know she is still sleeping, mentally.

My dog is awake. "See I'm here, I'm up! Where are we going? What are we doing? Do you need some help? Unless you aren't staying up, then I'm not up either. In that case I'm going back to sleep. Are we going back to sleep? I'm fine with going back sleep. No? Staying up, good, that's what I wanted."

Somewhere my hat is lonely and cold.

*********************************

I don't know what to think about the game today. This Spartan team can score enough points to win. If the kicking game (coverage and returns) can make a big play or two, the turnovers are kept under control, and the defense can make ONE BIG PLAY -- just one fumble recovery for a score or a timely interception -- and the safeties hit hard and the defensive ends bring pressure and pain this game could honestly be an MSU walkaway. But it won't be.

I am still not sold that MSU can run the ball when it wants to. Winston had a nice week but isn't the shifty kind of back that keeps plays alive. He gets what he is supposed to, maybe 10% more on the end of a run.

Ringer got extra at the beginning, middle, and end of runs. He was strong and agile. Winston is more Duckett like. Good after he gets a head of steam and a punishing finisher. That doesn't work when the offensive line is banged up and the ball carrier gets hit in the backfield. I like the Caper/Winston duo. I also like whatever running back holds on to the ball in this rainy weather.

Ummm has a knack for sucking the linebackers and safeties up to the line, making a crease, and then the running back is gone. They basically make you spy TaintForcy-eh?, make you focus on the edges, and run short enough routes 90% of the time that your corners and safeties end up pressing at the line. When your defense is a total of 10' deep it doesn't take much to break one.

No matter what the "facts" and "statistics" and "reality" might tell us about this Spartan team I cannot pick against them. Can't do it.

MSU - 28
umm - 25

AA tailgates = cheese and whine

Ok. "Spartan Bob" stopped the clock prematurly, after about 8 terrible umm penalties kept the game alive, and no one covered TJ Ducket. MSU won. And all these years later we are still talking about it. Frank Beckman and Jim Brandfatter cried that day and wake up crying everyday, not just about that situation, but about every call that results in an ummm loss.

Why does no one bring up the fact that ummm is the Duke basketball of Division I football? Lloyd would cry, whine, and pout -- like all coaches do -- but then the call would actually change for ummm. Then, when a call doesn't get changed "michigan has been wronged."

And what about the calls that they just get, without needing to cry? Do you hear them complaining? No, you just hear Brandfatter mouth breathing and inhaling a donut.

Take last week at Indiana. Gift wrapped calls, especially an obvious one (tie goes to the offensive player), are the norm for ummm. Its pretty sad that it takes a terrible, horrible call in a home game against a freakishly bad team to squeak out a last minute win.

MSU had a TD taken away last year on a bad call against umm. No crying there.

ummm player punches ND player in face. No call, no ejection, no recognition for snake-oil-salesman of the month. Replay in same game overturns ND TD. Wrong call.

Just sayin, shut up already about the clock.

ummm week

I want more than anything to talk all sorts of trash, and working off the assumptions of one month ago, I had plenty of material ready. However, it is hard to say too much with a defense this bad.

Potential Problems:

1. the other team running the ball

2. the other team passing the ball

3. the other team playing offense


Potential Bright Spots:

1. hitting a scambling QB so hard he needs smelling salts, now called TimTebowing the QB

2. hitting any wide receiver that runs an end around or slant so hard he leaves not only the game, but the conference

3. knowing their coach is still a weasely weiner*

4. making signs w/ Little Man Tate and Taint written on them

5. picking this week to come out of a funk and help fight UWWA**

6. being one week closer to basketball season

Here are two of my favorite WVU signs:

*Will he wins games? yes
Will he ever be a winner? please

**Unfounded Walmart Wolverine Arrogance

My Missing Hat: Day 147

I have decided to turn the status of my hat from misplaced to stolen. I have also decided that I will write about this hat everyday until the masses unite to complete the world's first hat search party.



The hat is green with white script "State" across the front and a white Spartan helmet across the fitted back.

A very expensive and high tech program* was used to render an updated image of the hat. It has been aged to represent what it would look like today.












If you have infomation about the location of this hat please contact the Francis Gazette. The high end retailer that originally offered this item, Lids, no longer sells this item. Most new options are "so girl who wears a skirt as a shirt."

*Microsoft Paint 1.0 (is there another version?)